So, I discovered facebook.  I don’t have to type as much there to leave a mark as I feel I must to write a post and laziness overtook me.

But I think I am nearly ready to return to blogging.  There are so many thoughts that need fleshed out in words that can’t fit in a sound bite.  So many stories that deserve more than a 3 sentence limit will allow.

And, of course, I just miss typing.

Why have I stayed away so long?

Partly, I’ve just been enjoying reading the writing of others.

I’ve been distracted by the needs of my four children between 2 and 6 (will turn 7 this month, so it’s not quite as crazy as it sounds.)

We added pigs and silver dorking chickens and a calf and performed all manner of hobby farm type projects.

I have hit year two of marriage.

Well.

Sort of.

When Matt and I were married, I was sorely ill-prepared to share my life with someone else.  I was frustrated, antsy, grumpy, demanding and all the stereotypical reasons males give for not seeing marriage as a blessing but more as a shackle.  Yep.  That was me.

Things have changed since then.  A great deal.

Part of it has been God working in me.  Some is God working in him.  All of it is God.  We have entered the ‘sweet spot’ as it were.  We both know how bad it can get and that the other one will meet us on the other side of it.  We have security in the other’s love for us, finally expecting it to be unconditional and knowing that this expectation will be met.   To all of you who haven’t reached this in your marriage yet, I encourage you to hold on.  It’s worth it.

However, we essentially added a new family member about 3 years ago.

Not my youngest daughter.  She just turned two.

Not any of our animals.  they are either older or younger than 3.  Except maybe a few of our chickens.

My mother moved in with us when we relocated to our little slice of farm life, and she’s been a joy.  She is a wealth of information, a constantly available adult perspective amidst the chaos of children’s insights, another pair of hands, and an all around a blessing.

But we’ve gotten more familiar with one another through these last few years, and I think we are both feeling that ‘the honeymoon is over’ stage of co-dwelling relationships.

It isn’t fun.  It’s frustrating to start noticing how annoying little things are… little things that shouldn’t really matter… when you KNOW they shouldn’t matter… and are equally aware that you are irritated anyway.

It’s more frustrating to realize that if you were everything YOU should be, none of the other person’s ‘flaws’ or quirks would bother you at all.  You could look on them with grace and love and cover offenses easily and readily without prompting, without losing your temper first.

It is GOOD to know that this part of the adjustment period will undoubtedly be shorter than the one my husband and I suffered through, not the least because I’ve been there before.  I know that if I persevere and work on communicating and giving in and reigning in my own preferences, she and I will hit that ‘sweet spot’ too.  And then I’ll have a second person I couldn’t dream of making a home without.

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