In a world with access to a number of lists, photos, ideals, and quizzes that tell us all about how to be _________________.
In a church where I seem to have little to no value in comparison to _____________________.
At a time when my family’s values don’t look like ___________.
In a marriage where, despite my husband’s ongoing and often undeserved love, I feel inadaquate compared to____________. 
In a life that looks a mess next to __________.
With a list of goals and desires for myself, our marriage, our family and our walk that are mostly pulled from people I desire to emulate who may or may not be similar enough to me/us for that to be effective…
And in a frame of mind where I myself compare other’s faults to my strengths so…um…graciously…yes, that’s the word.  Sure.
 
In a huge circle of doubt wondering who I really am versus who I pretend/desire to be and which of those traits/goals/values/etc I should actually have as a reborn child of God that is becoming like Christ but doing so in the way a person He made like ME would become like Him, I still have no answers, but because the following message made me feel all teary, I at least know that it’s probably time for bed.  If when I awake in the morning rested, {snicker} refreshed, {giggle} and ready to face a new day {snortle!!  -that’s a snort and a chortle all mixed up} I still feel this way, it will require my serious consideration.  For now, we’ll leave it at the same level as one of my favorite quotes….
 
 

No man for any considerable period can wear one face to himself and another to
the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may be the true.
The Scarlet Letter, Nathaniel Hawthorne

 
 
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